Empty

I've figured it out- this dull weariness I've spent the past few days in.
I'm allowing fears of a future, worries of the day, frustrations of life blur the line of my focus away from Jesus.

Jesus, my advocator, who has gone before me. Jesus, my God that humbly became a man, lived a perfect life and died on a cross. He rose again and He reigns forever. His goodness & light is in me but I hide it away. But I want to share it, I want to love others well. I don't want it to be all mine, alone.

I wear a cross, as a symbol of His death, His sacrifice for me while I was still a sinner, He paid my ransom. The cross should also be a symbol of another death-- the one that overtakes us when we let all but our heart for Him fall away from us. I want to die and become new again, again daily.

I can't say how many times I've prayed to be empty & that's exactly what I'm becoming but that can't be all. I need also to be filled with you, Father. 

Make me empty, painlessly so. Then fill me up again. Then let it pour out and be shared forevermore.
Let that be my greatest joy in life without fear or reservation or worry at all.